Posted by Bob_Loblaw on another site, used with permission.
Obviously, everyone will say the number one thing a customer can do is spend money. More specifically though, I think the key is in how a customer spends money. IMO, it should be both generously AND frequently.
Taking the focus off dancers for a brief moment, if you want to improve your club experience I think it’s vitally important to tip the wait staff generously. Not only will they serve you faster and be more attentive to your needs, they will be much friendlier and project a positive vibe which is especially beneficial when a dancer joins you at your table. A dancer can obtain some hints about what kind of customer you could potentially be from the interaction between you and the waitress. If you’ve established a level of comfort with your waitress that allows her to laugh and joke with you, odds are you are a pretty good customer to her. In effect, you’ve been pre-screened by the waitress. If you tip the waitress generously, odds are you’ll be generous to the dancer. If the waitress asks if you’d like to buy the dancer a drink and you readily accept or if you take the initiative and offer to buy a drink for the dancer on your own, odds are you’ll be willing to spend more money on the dancer. I strongly believe it’s important for customers to have ATF waitresses and to do their best to ensure they sit in their sections to reap the benefits.
If you’re sitting close to the stage, stage tipping should be a must by rule. You’re receiving entertainment value from the stage show so it’s only fair the dancer performing receives compensation for it. When stage tipping, tips should be offered freely and without strings. There’s no need to make a dancer “work for it” as she’s already on stage working for you.
Buy dances! If you’ve allowed a dancer to sit with you for a while, you’d better be prepared to at least tip for her time if you’re not going to buy dances. When it comes to buying dances, I have a self imposed rule of a two dance minimum per dancer. I believe single dance buyers are viewed as an annoyance by most dancers and so it’s extremely rare that I’ll stop after one dance. When I have, it’s only because she’s caused me some sort of unbearable extreme discomfort. Of course some guys may think I’m crazy for spending any additional money on a dance I’m not really into but I believe it still positively contributes to my club experience. Firstly, girls talk and I don’t want to be identified as a one-and-done customer who then gets passed over by other dancers who’s company I would have otherwise enjoyed. Or even if they don’t talk, dancers are pretty observant and can see your spending habits. On the other hand, if you make frequent trips to the private dance area for extended periods of time, dancers will see that too and generally are more enthusiastic when approaching. I go into the club expecting to spend money anyway and burning the cost of a dance two or three times over the course of a night is something I’m prepared to do. I have a lot more fun when I don’t have to constantly worry about stretching my dollars.
Leave the club when you’ve exhausted your strip club budget. It goes back to the first point I made about not wasting the dancers’ time and prevents you from being labeled a time waster.
Always tip for dances as generously as one can afford. And when it comes to buying a block of dances (or time) where I’m getting a volume discount on dances, my personal rule is to always pay the equivalent of full price dances as a bare minimum. For example, if I’m getting a two-for-one dance, I’ll pay her for the two dances. Or if I’m paying $300 for an hour (when single dances are $20/ea for approx 3 mins each), I’d give her $500 ($400 worth of full price dances plus an extra $100 tip which works out to only 20% if you think about it in those terms).
I will never negotiate the price of a dance. I will never ask a dancer for change. I will never get so many dances from a girl that I can no longer afford to provide a good tip. I will never negotiate for contact. I will never request extras. I will never tell a dancer how to do her job. I will never request OTC. I will never ask for personal details. I will never offer backhanded compliments. I will never say anything bad about another dancer to her. I will never complain to her about her dances. I will never complain about the club or staff to her. I will never play mind games. I will never eat stage side (I’ve never understood this behavior as I think it’s plain rude). I will never monopolize a dancer’s time without spending money.
I will be open to her approach. I will be comfortable with her comfort level. If all she’s comfortable offering is an airdance, I will be content with that. I will let her take the lead. I will be as honest and modest as possible. I will respect her boundaries. I will try to keep the mood light and positive. I will pay attention to her as she speaks. I will always be polite. I will always thank her for her time.
I will take a shower and wash my hair before going to the club. I will wear clothes that are freshly washed. Unless I’ve intentionally grown out facial hair, I will ensure I’m clean shaven. I will brush my teeth prior to going to the club and will carry some sort of breath freshening aids with me (e.g., mints, gum, breath strips, etc.). I will avoid food and beverages the day of a strip club visit that would contribute to bad breath (e.g., garlic, beer, etc.). With regards to cologne, I choose not to wear any and find it unnecessary particularly after just showering.
Where lap dance clubs are concerned, I’ll avoid wearing belts and button down shirts or shirts with zippers. While they may look good, I find the buttons/zippers can catch on a dancers clothes and are a source of discomfort for many dancers. On the other hand, I’ve received many compliments/thanks for wearing soft and smooth clothes. Other positive reinforcement I’ve received is compliments for smooth, soft skin (face, neck, arms, hands). Sorry to get all metro but moisturizing will always be appreciated. I also ensure my nails are maintained. Oh, and lip balm is a good idea too (no, not for kissing) as the sight of chapped lips is unsightly. Basically, just look presentable and ensure you’re not the source of any unpleasant odors (which includes overpowering cologne).
Ladies: What do you think?? Would this be your ideal client?
Gentlemen: Can we do this? Is this realistic and doable?
I wish my customers were like this!!
i truly enjoyed every line of respect that was the customers concern for the dancer. if every customer thought about the: i will nots pretaining to the dancer. it would not leave me room in my mind for a negative what if thought.
Great piece of writing and actually assists with learning the subject matter much better.
If only they were all like you!!! Thank you for being such a considerate audience member and all-round gentleman!!!!!
I believe that how a man acts when he’s in a strip club says a lot about how he is in everyday life.
Example: Dude at my home club gets too drunk too quickly, bitches about the price of his $5.50 beer and asks the waitress for his quarters back. Buys a $100 half-hour room with me, during which I have to give continual requests for him to control his wandering hands. Asks for a BJ (his request was declined). DOES NOT TIP ME, and cites my “prudishness” as his reason why. At the end of the half hour, he says, “I’d love to take you out to dinner sometime, outside of here.”
It took every iota of willpower and tact in my being not to blurt out, “Not if you’re going to be as rude to the people in the restaurant as you were to the people in MY workplace.”